Pretty Isn't Pretty Enough
How Social Media Warps Beauty, Identity, and Self-Worth
In today’s social media landscape, pretty isn’t pretty enough. We scroll endlessly past filtered faces, curated feeds, and perfect snapshots, yet the feeling lingers that no matter how much beauty we display or consume, it never feels satisfying. Olivia Rodrigo’s song Pretty Isn’t Pretty Enough captures this restless craving perfectly, but the struggle it expresses runs far deeper than music or pop culture—it strikes at the heart of how beauty functions in our psyches and societies today.
Beauty has always been an elusive ideal, shaped by cultural norms, historical contexts, and individual desires. But social media has accelerated and intensified this shift, turning beauty into a shape-shifting, almost unattainable standard. It’s no longer just about physical features but about mastering an entire aesthetic and performing it publicly. The flood of images creates a relentless benchmark that rewires our internal sense of what it means to be attractive or desirable.
Psychologically, humans are wired to compare, this is a survival mechanism rooted in social hierarchy and mate selection. But social media amplifies this impulse exponentially. Exposure to endless idealized images triggers upward social comparison, often resulting in feelings of inadequacy, envy, and lowered self-esteem. The dopamine hits from likes and comments create a feedback loop that ties our self-worth to external approval, fragmenting our sense of identity into a performance crafted for others.
In the digital age, beauty is more than appearance, it’s a form of social currency. The value placed on “likes” and online attention transforms beauty into a market commodity, where individuals curate their image to maximize rewards from an invisible algorithm. This commodification doesn’t only pressure people to conform to specific standards; it also encourages continuous self-surveillance and modification, leading to exhaustion and emotional burnout.
Philosophically, the predicament raises profound questions about the nature of beauty and human worth. Is beauty an inherent quality, or is it a social construct constantly shaped by the gaze of others? Simone de Beauvoir argued that women, in particular, are often reduced to their appearance by a male gaze that defines their value externally. Today, this gaze is diffused globally through countless screens, intensifying the pressure to be beautiful according to shifting norms rather than authentic self-expression.
Moreover, existential philosophers invite us to consider that authentic self-worth cannot be founded on external validation, which is always contingent and unstable. Instead, they encourage a turn inward, where value arises from embracing one’s unique being rather than meeting socially prescribed ideals.
The psychological toll of this environment is significant. Researchers link the rise of social media with increasing rates of anxiety, depression, and body dissatisfaction, especially among younger populations. The distorted beauty standards recalibrate our internal “baseline” of normalcy, leading to chronic feelings of not measuring up. This dynamic can trap individuals in cycles of self-criticism and alienation from their own bodies and identities.
If pretty isn’t pretty enough, then what is? The real question shifts from external appearance to internal acceptance. What does it mean to be enough for oneself rather than for an audience? Psychology suggests that genuine self-esteem emerges from self-compassion, authenticity, and connection to others unmediated by image or performance. This inward journey challenges the social media narrative and opens space for redefining beauty as diverse, imperfect, and deeply personal.
Olivia Rodrigo’s Pretty Isn’t Pretty Enough captures a cultural moment saturated with these tensions, between craving approval and grappling with the dissatisfaction it breeds. Her words offer a sonic mirror to a society wrestling with how to find self-worth in a world that monetizes appearance and comparison. But beyond this cultural reflection lies an invitation: to break the cycle, reclaim our perceptions of beauty, and ground our value in something more enduring than fleeting likes.
References
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Fardouly, J., Diedrichs, P. C., Vartanian, L. R., & Halliwell, E. (2024). Social media and body image concerns: Current research and future directions. American Psychological Association. https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2023/02/social-media-body-image
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